I’ve been flirting online with a fellow spanko hottie of late, as I am wont to do. Few things fulfill me more than chatting candidly about our favorite thing with Our People. As a form of delicious dirty talk, though he’s quite far away, we engage in fantasies of getting into shenanigans as a hypothetical spanko couple. I’ve never been to the South where he lives, but he tells me his area is full of creepy old Baptist churches and one near him is also used as a community space for non-churchy activities. Sometimes he gets to work there for his jobby.
“This is the perfect place,” he said yesterday via text, “for me to give you SOME of your weekly spankings.”
Ugh. Such an erotic punch to the gut. I could melt into a swoony pool of glitter right here and be done with it. “Weekly,” the man declares. What he’s referring to, of course, is the concept of Maintenance Spankings.
Maintain: to keep in an existing state (as of repair, efficiency, or validity); preserve from failure or decline
Maintenance spankings, for anyone not in the know, are a type of spanking designed to keep the spankee on their best behavior rather than punish them for naughty acts they’ve already committed. Some people treat them like ‘catch-all’ spankings. “Anything you deserve to be spanked for this week will be addressed on Sunday while you’re over my knee.” That’s not my preference for them, however. Maintenance spankings, to me, should happen regardless of whether or not any actual offenses have occurred, even when the recipient has played the part of Perfect Angel. They may have done nothing wrong, but a good disciplinarian will want to ensure it stays that way and must therefore strive to keep their partner on their perpetual Ps and Qs.
Maintenance spankings are often scheduled to happen regularly, like a yoga class or physical therapy appointment. They can be carried out monthly, weekly, or even more often than that (!!) depending on the specifics of the situation and desires of the participants. A truly spunky spankee might need to be taken in hand EVERY DAY. 😳
The first time I read about maintenance spankings online as a teenager, I felt:
1) overwhelmed with arousal, and
2) delightfully seen.
“YES. What a GLORIOUS idea. SO romantic and imbued with devotion. What brilliant genius came up with this? KNIGHT THEM IMMEDIATELY.”
This type of session is not about having a play partner “put me in my place” when I’ve slipped up and am feeling guilty. It’s also not about “spanking for fun,” as fantastic as spanking for fun always is. Those interactions are important, but I’m a good girl who (usually) has her shit together by now and elects not to cause chaos. I don’t often feel deserving of punishment. However, that doesn’t negate my desire for discipline delivered with sincerity.
A partner who cares enough to engage in maintenance with me will want my mind on the state of my naughtiness or lack thereof all the time.
Am I doing my best, and if not, is there anyone I trust who’d actually care? Hmmm…
To walk around with a sore bottom on a regular basis is to hold those questions at the forefront of my focus and feel confident the answer to the second must be yes. How I’m navigating life matters, and not only to me. There would indeed be consequences long before I got comfortable acting out or neglecting my responsibilities. That level of attention, from the right person, keeps my pussy drenched from dawn ‘til dusk. L’amour!!
Maintenance spankings, in my humble opinion, should be carried out in a particular manner. They’re not punishment spankings because, in my version of them at least, nothing naughty has transpired. I would find it inappropriate to instill the same level of intensity in such a session. There is no need for guilt or chastisement.
At the same, maintenance should resemble punishment in some way, as a reminder of what will come should agreements about expectations actually be broken. Just a taste. Therefore, any ritual involved in punishment spankings should be followed. The headspace should be there, but with slightly lower stakes. Glimpses of punishment should occur without exposing the raw, jagged edges of emotion that make correction so potent, unique, and scary. Maintenance creates a space to reinforce the element of dominance and submission, but one that’s not predicated on the energetic peaks and valleys of the dynamic. It’s a place for souls to meet and reaffirm, “This is important to us and we are important to each other.”
UGH.
I can hardly stand it.
To me, this all comes back to the fact that for fetishists, spanking is never a thoughtless physical act or chore to be carried out. It is an art and a love language. It is a service. It is a display of affection between caring, consenting adults who truly want what’s best for each other. It is the essence of romance—a state of ardent emotional involvement with another that keeps us yearning for more.
“You need a spanking.”
Good lord, it’s true. We do. We must spank and be spanked. The craving runs deep on a constant basis, not just when we’re feeling cheeky.
Do you change the oil in the car you drive? Pay your rent and bills? Wash the dishes and take out the trash?
I’d hope you do. #NoScrubs
In the same vein, spank your spanko. Maintain their focus so they’re never led astray and can feel the comfort of your dedicated passion at all times. The grass is greenest where you water it. Let yours be lush.
-T